One of the most compelling reasons, to me, for practicing Centering Prayer is the potential opportunity to hear God's voice. I am not talking about an audible voice, but rather a sense of God's presence and an intimate communication beyond words. I have been a Christian for almost 40 years. Although I have always known that I received the Holy Spirit promised in Acts 2:38, actually knowing how the Holy Spirit communicates to us has been a puzzle to me. Quite frankly, for many years I questioned whether I even had the Holy Spirit, because I did not feel anything discernible beyond the constant drone of my own internal voice. CP really changed that for me, but today I realized something about my communication with my earthly father that I believe is indicative of my communication with my heavenly Father because of CP. My dad has been in the cardiac ICU for the past several days. 2 days ago they had to put him on a ventilator when his lung collapsed. When on a ventilator you have to be heavily sedated or your body will fight against the tube going down your throat. In this state you are basically paralyzed and you cannot talk. According to my sister, who is a nurse, my dad can still hear me. However, talking to someone who cannot respond to you in any way really makes you wonder if they are hearing you. Today my mom, two of my kids and myself came in to see him. They were trying to wean him off the ventilator, so they had cut back on the sedation medicine. He was able to nod and point and move his feet. If we could ask the right questions he could respond to us without words. This totally changed the communication dynamic and we were overcome by emotion knowing that he heard us and could respond to us. That is really all I ever wanted from my Father in heaven, to know that he hears me and responds to me in meaningful ways. CP opens the way for this kind of meaningful communication. As I sit quietly, emptying my mind of the constant drone of my own voice and the noise pollution the world creates, God is able to communicate with me. Not necessarily with audible words, but in a deeply intimate way. A gentle nod of the head or movement of my Father's foot brings inexpressible joy to my heart in a way that only I can understand. After the procedure to remove the ventilator failed, they had to crank up the sedation medicine and he could no longer communicate, but it was OK, because I knew he could hear us. It is the same with our heavenly Father. Once we have perceived that intimate communication, we don't have to worry if he does not respond every time to our queries, because we KNOW that he hears us. That calm assurance that God hears me and that he loves me is all that I need. He may communicate to me in ways my senses can comprehend, or he may communicate with me through the Holy Spirit in ways I cannot comprehend. He knows what I need and when I need it. CP allows me to be quiet enough to hear when he does have something to communicate and the peace to accept his silence when he doesn't.
Peace be with You,
Adam
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